Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category
Furry Red Monsters
Posted on: October 28, 2006
- In: Humor | YouTube
- 4 Comments
I always knew there was something a little off with that Elmo character. Dude, even the dog looks slightly skeeved!
And yet, why do I secretly wish I had a TMX Elmo of my own? Oh, and in case you need reminding that Elmo is supposed to be the cute, non-deranged monster on Sesame Street, check out his little convo with Robert DeNiro…
I love those last few seconds where they’re laughing their heads off — too cute! :D
In much more depressing news, the much hated Next Term and I meet tomorrow (on a Sunday!!!). A tout a l’heure Social Life — it was fun while it lasted. :(
I Am So Bad
Posted on: October 27, 2006
- In: Family | Humor | Life
- 8 Comments
A few weeks ago, I took my brother to the US embassy to re-new his passport. As you probably know already, before entering the embassy, everyone is required to check in their belongings and undergo a brief security check. Well, when our turn came around, I passed through scot-free. My brother, however, didn’t.
And it was all because of me. Turns out that a few days prior I’d asked my brother to keep my embryology notes in his backpack for me and had completely forgotten about them. Which is why the last thing I ever expected was for the security guard to stop my brother and pull out my packet of notes on the male reproductive system and stare at them. And rather intensely, I might note.
J: Why is he staring at your notes like that?
ME: I don’t know. Maybe he thinks they’re secret plans for weapons of mass destruction?
J: Huh?
ME: You know, missiles.
J: I know what WMDs are. But what do your notes have to do with missiles?
ME: Come on. You’re a guy. Those are notes on the male reproductive system. USE YOUR IMAGINATION.
Calling All Asian-Americans
Posted on: February 10, 2006
- In: Humor
- 14 Comments
“We come all the way from the far country China and we born you here in America just so you can get B plus?”
Regardless of motherland — whether it be China, Vietnam, Japan, India or Korea — you have GOT to check this out. I laughed so hard I cried…even after the tenth viewing. When I showed it to my dad, he said, after wiping away his tears and clutching his abdomen as he was laughing so hard, “Someone needs to give these kids their own TV show. Oh, and sorry if your mom and I ever did that to you when you were a kid. We couldn’t help it; our parents were Chinese too, you know.”
Anyway, without further ado…
- In: Books | Family | Humor | Music | Photography | Thailand | Wanderlust
- 22 Comments
“Happy in Phuket!”
As promised, here are the pics from our little sojourn to Phuket.
But before I get to that, let me tell you about the flight over. We sat in front of a young Japanese-American couple with three kids — the oldest being around nineish and the youngest being a couple months old. The middle child, a sixish-year-old son, was at that age where he tried to spell and read EVERYTHING in sight. And when I say everything, I MEAN EVERYTHING.
KID: Ma, what day is it today?
MOM: Saturday
KID: Saturday. Today is Saturday. S-A-D-E-R-D-A-Y. Right, Mom?
MOM: [Busy trying to get her baby to stop pulling my brother’s hair] Right, honey. No, no Takeshi. Don’t pull people’s hair.
KID: Ma, what’s this word?
MOM: Philosophy.
KID: How come you don’t call it pilosopy?
MOM: Whenever you see a P with an H, you pronounce it like an F. See? So this word becomes Philosophy.
KID: So how come we don’t call Phuket Fuk-it?
Mom: Because…that’s…an exception. Don’t ever call Phuket that, sweetie.
[A couple of minutes later]
KID: [Flipping through the music selection at the back of the Thai Airways in flight magazine, reading aloud the various music selections] Black Eyed Peas. My humps. Ma, what is a hump?
MOM: A hump? A hump is like a bump.
KID: Why would someone sing about a bump?
MOM: I don’t know, sweetie.
KID: [Putting his headphones on] Ma, help me find the song.
[Some twenty minutes later]
KID: Ma, what are lady lumps?
Needless to say, by the time we reached Phuket, my brother and I had nearly wet ourselves laughing. Kids — ya gotta love ’em.
Conversations With My Brother
Posted on: November 13, 2005
- In: Books | Family | Humor | Music
- 11 Comments
[After overhearing some guy let out a huge belch while having kuay thiew at a roadside vendor]
JASON: Man, I can never burp.
LYNN: What are you talking about? Everyone can burp. Even babies can burp.
J: Nuh-uh. I can’t.
L: Yes you can, dimwit. I used to burp you when you were a baby. Sometimes you’d hurl all over my shoulder, too.
J (shaking head): Not anymore, I can’t.
L: Well, next time you feel a rush of gas coming up your esophagus, let it out.
J: I can’t. Whenever a rush of gas comes up my esophagus, it ends up getting pushed back down and out my ass.
Read the rest of this entry »
Bearnapped…
Posted on: October 7, 2005
- In: Friends | Humor | Randomness
- 2 Comments
The (Hot!) Phantom of the Opera
Posted on: April 27, 2005
This entry’s a little late, especially since I saw The (Hot!) Phantom of the Opera way back in February (um, three times). But I thought I’d dedicate this here post to him the film since I just purchased a *cough*bootleg*cough* copy from my favorite CD vendor along Silom Road before the Songkran holiday. And before you run off to alert the authorities, I’ll have you know that I do intend to buy the DVD when it comes out. It’s just that, well, patience was never really my strongest forte.
I first heard about The Phantom of the Opera when I was in 4th grade. My teacher, Ms. Miller, was an INSANE POTO fan. She made us listen to a song off the London West End version of POTO every single frickin morning. Some days it was Music of the Night, which was good for lulling us to sleep. Other days it was The Point of No Return, which was pretty scandalous in itself considering we were just a bunch of 9-year-old kids listening to lyrics like, What raging fire shall flood the soul? What rich desire unlocks its door? What sweet seduction lies before us? (“What’s seduction, Ms. Miller?”); and, In my mind I’ve already imagined our bodies entwining defenceless and silent (“What’s entwining, Ms. Miller? How can I make my body entwine?”). And everyday sweet Ms. Miller — bless her heart — would swoon in her chair and tell us for the umpteenth time about the Phantom and how so very sad it was that he was condemned to live out the rest of his days alone and heartbroken in the basement of the Opera Populaire, and how it was all that black-hearted Christine Daae’s fault. Yawn, we all said, but if it meant shorter math lessons, then great! Crank up the volume! Bring on the Andrew Lloyd Webber masterpieces!
The most fun song for me, however, was the movie’s theme song. I mean, how laughingly 80’s can you possibly get? It was perfect. There were the electric guitars, syncopated percussions, pipe organs, and everything. The only thing that was missing was the big hair, shoulder pads, and Meatloaf. The 2004 movie version is even greater, because guess what? They’ve got hand claps! (“In sleep he sang to me” — clap, clap! — “In dreams he came” — clap, clap!) Makes me laugh like a loon. By the time the “sing, my angel of music — SING!” part comes along, I’m usually in tears.
Anyways, without further ado, I shall present to you…
The Phantom of the Opera!
I Dare You Not to Laugh
Posted on: April 20, 2005
- In: Family | Humor
- 11 Comments
Check this out, and while you do, I DARE YOU NOT TO LAUGH.
By the way, you might not want to click on the above link if you’re at work or in a public place.
Anyway, in other news, check out the newest member of the family (after the jump). She’s over in Houston, so I have yet to meet her, but will you take a look at that pic? How awesome is she? No, she’s not picking her nose, but damn, does she do a fantastic Mini-Me/Doc Evil impersonation or what?
“Hi, I’m Baby Natalie! Mini-Me and me, we close like diz!”
Congratulations P’Ju & Phido. :)
brain farts 
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